Coke* - The Effects

From the ACA member mailing list:

Have you ever wondered why Coke comes with a smile? It’s because it gets
you high. They took the cocaine out almost a hundred years ago. You know
why? It was redundant.

* *In The First 10 minutes:* 10 teaspoons of sugar hit your system.
(100% of your recommended daily intake.) You don’t immediately
vomit from the overwhelming sweetness because phosphoric acid cuts
the flavor allowing you to keep it down.

* *20 minutes:* Your blood sugar spikes, causing an insulin burst.
Your liver responds to this by turning any sugar it can get its
hands on into fat. (There’s /plenty /of that at this particular
moment)

* *40 minutes:* Caffeine absorption is complete. Your pupils dilate,
your blood pressure rises, as a response your livers dumps /more
sugar/ into your bloodstream. The adenosine receptors in your
brain are now blocked preventing drowsiness.

* *45 minutes:* Your body ups your dopamine production stimulating
the pleasure centers of your brain. This is physically the same
way heroin works, by the way.

* *>60 minutes:* The phosphoric acid binds calcium, magnesium and
zinc in your lower intestine, providing a further boost in
metabolism. This is compounded by high doses of sugar and
artificial sweeteners also increasing the urinary excretion of
calcium.

* *>60 Minutes:* The caffeine’s diuretic properties come into play.
(It makes you have to pee.) It is now assured that you’ll evacuate
the bonded calcium, magnesium and zinc that was headed to your
bones as well as sodium, electrolyte and water.

* *>60 minutes:* As the rave inside of you dies down you’ll start to
have a sugar crash. You may become irritable and/or sluggish.
You’ve also now, literally, pissed away all the water that was in
the Coke. But not before infusing it with valuable nutrients your
body could have used for things like even having the /ability/ to
hydrate your system or build strong bones and teeth.

This will all be followed by a caffeine crash in the next few hours. (As
little as two if you’re a smoker.) But, hey, have another Coke, it’ll
make you feel better.